Critical Mass

Being a Laker supporter and Boston hater, it’s difficult to pen out what exactly I saw happen last night without throwing things – mainly half-full beer bottles – at stationary objects near me. I’ve tried to type about the record first quarter but it’s coming out more so in keyboard scream form than anything readable. So, that is why I’ve lured The Intern out of retirement to give his Game 4 thoughts.
~Dan

Do you here that sound? That’s Jack Nicholson smashing himself in the face with his $20,000 courtside collapsible seat after witnessing his beloved Lakers implode in the second half and eventually dry out like an over-cooked burrito. The best way to describe game 4 would be a tale of two halves but knowing the sports media, that is what everyone else is going to say up until Sunday so I’ll take the high road and compare it to the George Clooney classic movie “From Dusk ’til Dawn.”

Now this analogy works on two levels. The first level being that “From Dusk Till Dawn” was essentially two films under the guise of being one. The second level is of a literal nature, being how after half time this game changed from night to day. If you solely watched the first half you would have definitely counted Boston down for the ten count. The Lakers were doing everything right: Crisp ball moment, not too many missed defensive assignments and Lamar Odom had finally awoken from his finals slumber. But alas this lasted for just 24 for minutes because once the Lakers stepped back on the floor for the second half it all came crashing back to earth like the fridge scene from Indiana Jones 4. You have to give some major props to the Celts for their fantastic D in the second half and the Lakers horrible offensive execution combined with Lamar Odom’s consistent choke artistry.

When I was watching that commercial for Will Smith’s coming summer blockbuster “Hancock” and it would say: “There are heroes,” while showing clips of Kobe and Garnett, I was thinking to myself about an alternative version saying: “There are disappearing heroes,” and it would have clips of Lamar missing layups and other “gimme” baskets around the net. Ah, I love this game. With the Lakers down 3-1 now and pretty much done we can now focus on discussing the NBA’s officiating debacle.

Intern out.

Note: My original headline was “A tale of two halves.” The Intern knows me too well.